"No, I didn't like it." I said, wondering if I really meant what I said. The truth was actually that I absolutely hated it. I thought it was totally unnecessary and rather cruel of the rains and irresponsible on the part of the earth that bolstered it for years. My mom was talking about the great banyan tree that only a month ago stood in full glory inside the not-so-glorious compound of my building. When it fell, it took along with itself about 25 feet of the brick wall, half of the wrought iron grill of one of the flats in the neighborhood and left behind a handful of memories and an emptiness where it once stood that will always keep the memories alive.
The memories' strong tentacular grip tightened around me even more and pulled me into a well of nostalgia.
A little more than a decade ago, the tree was my best cricket buddy. It used to block all the balls hit in the air from going outside the compound (which was given out) when i batted and rebound them straight into my hands when i bowled. In the same match it could save boundaries, score runs, get wickets and do everything that the best of us could.
Behind its fatherly great trunk, under its motherly protective shade was the best place to hide in a game of hide and seek. We kids used to swing on its roots hanging from its branches; the picture almost resembling that of a family of a mother, a father and a toddler dangling between the two, holding one hand of each.
A honk or something got me back from the past into the present reality.
The tree really lived. It felt like we do. Probably the reason it decided to leave was that we all stopped visiting it, playing gleefully around it every evening. It punished us for not being there to give it company. It made us witness its fall, its execution, its mutilation and its journey to the graveyard.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Thursday, September 3, 2009
common general knowledge
Scene 1
Date: 2nd or 3rd July 2009
In the R&D lab (why do they call it lab? i see no lab equipment there!)
Bulldozer: okay, we are here today to discuss about the upcoming magazine. (Lowers her voice) though we have absolutely no idea what it will have as of now, (raises her voice to normal) I am sure, we will have great minds pondering over it from the staff as well as the students in good time, now that the vacations are going on, many may be out, holidaying.... blah blah blah... but we have to keep in mind that we have limited time. (She had to pause. she is habituated to saying long sentences and realizing mid-way that if she doesn’t pause for breath, she may choke to her demise.) The main agenda of this meeting is to take the first step in the direction... blah blah blah... we need to have a theme. Anyone from the teachers who would like to say anything or would like to share ideas on the theme because thats what we want first, it being our first ever... blah blah (yaaaawwwn) blah... We will make sure students read it without having to force them (another pause for air). So would anyone like to say anything?
Anthill: (he had been for a very long time impatiently listening and waiting for a chance to speak. almost giving an impression to those who observed him that he was trying to hold back a rather loud 'call of nature') why don’t we have an article on cricket. I like the cricket. its nice game. IPL also. Students can write on it.
(I really didn’t know whether he had come up with the 'brilliant' idea out of his usual 'brilliance' or the apparent 'call of nature' made him sound stupid in the company of me and supposedly more intelligent staff. I sighed)
Bulldozer: err... Yes you are right, anthill, but we are at present more interested in the theme of the magazine and not so much on the content, although the kind of articles that will go will be largely determined by the theme, … blah blah blah.... nonetheless we will consider your idea but right now lets focus on the theme. (Inhales)
(Silence)
(57 seconds later)
Me: (out of the sheer need to break the silence) blah blah blah (its not important what I said. it does not make for a great reading anyway)
Bulldozer: yes, I think thats a good idea, the first one. Okay so rajat has come up with an idea and I think... blah blah blah... (Where does all the vocal energy come from I wondered)... I think we have something on our hands now, something that we can take into our next meeting, but I am sure some of you might have some ideas.... blah blah blah... (I was glad the air conditioner had been switched on).... so what do you think?
(Bulldozer points at one of the electrical teachers with her hand - in which she was also clutching a handkerchief - seeking her opinion. the moment the teacher saw that all eyes were on her, she froze as if voldemort himself cast a 'stupefy' curse upon her.)
Anthill: well how about an article on why students should take up sports and balance studies and play. I think in fr.agays college, students study a lot.(smiles and expects to be smiled back at. only receives looks that express ridicule) they should not study so much, I mean, they should also play. Its important.
(Now he just crossed that fine line between confusion and stupidity, from apparent confusion over to the other side. I would have him kicked out of the meeting i thought, if I were bulldozer. I also thought, if I were bulldozer, I would try resting my vocal muscles more often. I would never want to be anthill though. he proved that he is a daft.)
Bulldozer: (exasperated) oh yes anthill, we would like to have such wonderful articles in the magazine but lets now concentrate on the theme. Now you know.... blah blah blah.... (Anthill gave me another opportunity to curse bulldozer for the same reason. I am fed up of that voice now, I thought to myself)
Scene 2
Date: September 3, 2009
Room number 105
Bulldozer: so we.... blah blah blah.... ("I walk on a lonely road”, I was singing to myself, "the only one that I have ever known, dont know where it goes....").... so kaushik, what are the topics that you have short-listed?
kaushik: "ma'am, our visual theme would be a social networking site, we thought twitter would look nice.....blah blah blah.... covering all topics and some, more importantly, are coherent with our theme of 'India 2009'.....blah blah blah.... there are topics like spirituality and youth, development vs. environment, (bulldozer nodding her head each time in acknowledgment),automobiles: hybrid cars, best places to work, blah, blah,(i was listening to him even though I had heard him read out the list at least a hundred times before. he must have the list by-heart now, I thought.),food, common English language mistakes heard on campus (bulldozer interrupted: "yeah you could talk about hinglish also", I went "I walk on a lonely road....", in my head), relatively unknown websites (bulldozer interrupted again, " WHAT SITES!.....oh, unknown websites, I thought honeymoon websites...hahehehuhuhmmm),robotic insects, and there are more.
(I was glad that anthill had been absent for all meetings that I had attended after that first one. oh yeah, but this was my first student-teacher meeting after that one in which I had been the only student. I wondered why he suddenly decided to part ways with the magazine committee; he not in the least seemed uninterested just 2 months ago. Well I am not complaining.)
kaushik: "......electronic waste, Da Vinci Robot for medical operations, Windows 7, Google Chrome OS, etc, stealth technology, 3D technology - 3D TV, 3D printer, etc, electric musical instruments - zitar etc. "
(‘Chandelier’ was quite during most part of the meeting and hardly had any participation apart ('afart'...haha) from her occasional nods and "hmmm"s. there was a pause in the conversation and she suddenly spoke, making sure, or trying to make sure most people would not be able to hear her...)
Chandelier: what is social networking...(I thought I made a mistake... she might not have said that...obviously not.... she is a teacher from the IT dept. anyway.... all those who heard her seemed to be taken aback and one of them asked her to kindly repeat what she said....)...social networking...what...(I heard only this much. I hoped she did not mean to ask the meaning of social networking. The answer to her query was on how some companies are recruiting people on the basis of their orkut profiles and stuff...doesn’t answer "whats social networking?” I thought...so maybe she didn’t ask that at all... anthill may well be absent, but I certainly didn’t want his shoes being filled by someone else... sigh...)
(kaushik who was sitting right next to chandelier, later informed me that she actually asked about recruiting through social networking sites and not what these sites are....thank god, we said in harmony..... 'whats with common general knowledge?' I thought. 'I wish it wasn’t as rare among people. 'General knowledge' and 'common sense' already are.')
Date: 2nd or 3rd July 2009
In the R&D lab (why do they call it lab? i see no lab equipment there!)
Bulldozer: okay, we are here today to discuss about the upcoming magazine. (Lowers her voice) though we have absolutely no idea what it will have as of now, (raises her voice to normal) I am sure, we will have great minds pondering over it from the staff as well as the students in good time, now that the vacations are going on, many may be out, holidaying.... blah blah blah... but we have to keep in mind that we have limited time. (She had to pause. she is habituated to saying long sentences and realizing mid-way that if she doesn’t pause for breath, she may choke to her demise.) The main agenda of this meeting is to take the first step in the direction... blah blah blah... we need to have a theme. Anyone from the teachers who would like to say anything or would like to share ideas on the theme because thats what we want first, it being our first ever... blah blah (yaaaawwwn) blah... We will make sure students read it without having to force them (another pause for air). So would anyone like to say anything?
Anthill: (he had been for a very long time impatiently listening and waiting for a chance to speak. almost giving an impression to those who observed him that he was trying to hold back a rather loud 'call of nature') why don’t we have an article on cricket. I like the cricket. its nice game. IPL also. Students can write on it.
(I really didn’t know whether he had come up with the 'brilliant' idea out of his usual 'brilliance' or the apparent 'call of nature' made him sound stupid in the company of me and supposedly more intelligent staff. I sighed)
Bulldozer: err... Yes you are right, anthill, but we are at present more interested in the theme of the magazine and not so much on the content, although the kind of articles that will go will be largely determined by the theme, … blah blah blah.... nonetheless we will consider your idea but right now lets focus on the theme. (Inhales)
(Silence)
(57 seconds later)
Me: (out of the sheer need to break the silence) blah blah blah (its not important what I said. it does not make for a great reading anyway)
Bulldozer: yes, I think thats a good idea, the first one. Okay so rajat has come up with an idea and I think... blah blah blah... (Where does all the vocal energy come from I wondered)... I think we have something on our hands now, something that we can take into our next meeting, but I am sure some of you might have some ideas.... blah blah blah... (I was glad the air conditioner had been switched on).... so what do you think?
(Bulldozer points at one of the electrical teachers with her hand - in which she was also clutching a handkerchief - seeking her opinion. the moment the teacher saw that all eyes were on her, she froze as if voldemort himself cast a 'stupefy' curse upon her.)
Anthill: well how about an article on why students should take up sports and balance studies and play. I think in fr.agays college, students study a lot.(smiles and expects to be smiled back at. only receives looks that express ridicule) they should not study so much, I mean, they should also play. Its important.
(Now he just crossed that fine line between confusion and stupidity, from apparent confusion over to the other side. I would have him kicked out of the meeting i thought, if I were bulldozer. I also thought, if I were bulldozer, I would try resting my vocal muscles more often. I would never want to be anthill though. he proved that he is a daft.)
Bulldozer: (exasperated) oh yes anthill, we would like to have such wonderful articles in the magazine but lets now concentrate on the theme. Now you know.... blah blah blah.... (Anthill gave me another opportunity to curse bulldozer for the same reason. I am fed up of that voice now, I thought to myself)
Scene 2
Date: September 3, 2009
Room number 105
Bulldozer: so we.... blah blah blah.... ("I walk on a lonely road”, I was singing to myself, "the only one that I have ever known, dont know where it goes....").... so kaushik, what are the topics that you have short-listed?
kaushik: "ma'am, our visual theme would be a social networking site, we thought twitter would look nice.....blah blah blah.... covering all topics and some, more importantly, are coherent with our theme of 'India 2009'.....blah blah blah.... there are topics like spirituality and youth, development vs. environment, (bulldozer nodding her head each time in acknowledgment),automobiles: hybrid cars, best places to work, blah, blah,(i was listening to him even though I had heard him read out the list at least a hundred times before. he must have the list by-heart now, I thought.),food, common English language mistakes heard on campus (bulldozer interrupted: "yeah you could talk about hinglish also", I went "I walk on a lonely road....", in my head), relatively unknown websites (bulldozer interrupted again, " WHAT SITES!.....oh, unknown websites, I thought honeymoon websites...hahehehuhuhmmm),robotic insects, and there are more.
(I was glad that anthill had been absent for all meetings that I had attended after that first one. oh yeah, but this was my first student-teacher meeting after that one in which I had been the only student. I wondered why he suddenly decided to part ways with the magazine committee; he not in the least seemed uninterested just 2 months ago. Well I am not complaining.)
kaushik: "......electronic waste, Da Vinci Robot for medical operations, Windows 7, Google Chrome OS, etc, stealth technology, 3D technology - 3D TV, 3D printer, etc, electric musical instruments - zitar etc. "
(‘Chandelier’ was quite during most part of the meeting and hardly had any participation apart ('afart'...haha) from her occasional nods and "hmmm"s. there was a pause in the conversation and she suddenly spoke, making sure, or trying to make sure most people would not be able to hear her...)
Chandelier: what is social networking...(I thought I made a mistake... she might not have said that...obviously not.... she is a teacher from the IT dept. anyway.... all those who heard her seemed to be taken aback and one of them asked her to kindly repeat what she said....)...social networking...what...(I heard only this much. I hoped she did not mean to ask the meaning of social networking. The answer to her query was on how some companies are recruiting people on the basis of their orkut profiles and stuff...doesn’t answer "whats social networking?” I thought...so maybe she didn’t ask that at all... anthill may well be absent, but I certainly didn’t want his shoes being filled by someone else... sigh...)
(kaushik who was sitting right next to chandelier, later informed me that she actually asked about recruiting through social networking sites and not what these sites are....thank god, we said in harmony..... 'whats with common general knowledge?' I thought. 'I wish it wasn’t as rare among people. 'General knowledge' and 'common sense' already are.')
Monday, August 31, 2009
Force.....India?
"India finishes 2nd. First podium finish for India".......and i went WHAT!!????
are you kidding me? is there an Indian team in formula one? which one? that team called 'force India'? i wonder why that mallya guy calls it that. for publicity sake i guess, maybe he thinks that would make people back home feel that 'mallya is indeed patriotic', probably he thinks he can fool Indians into thinking that force India is indeed an Indian team making a mark in the world of motor sport..... wish i could read his mind, but since i cant, heres my speculation on how his brain works....
now, most of the teams in formula one in my opinion are either owned by brands that get a lot of publicity out of owning a formula one team, namely red bull and the likes or they are car manufacturers that are vying for the top spot for a rise in their sales. if i were given an option between a Ferrari and a Jaguar (price and specifications being the same) i would obviously pick a Ferrari. because jaguar doesn't have a formula one team and the one that Ferrari has is really good. I'd hope that some of their formula one expertise would trickle down to its road cars as well.
i do not buy kingfisher airlines tickets and nor does anyone else because its owner also has a formula one team. i don't think he (vijay mallya) believes that motor sport enthusiasts have suddenly developed a taste for kingfisher soda (and other assorted beverages) after his success in formula one. so, in my opinion, all vijay mallya is doing, is living his motor sport fantasies, and how!!! indeed, money hai, toh honey hai...!!!
i wish he spent some moolah on education here in India. unfortunately people here have to work many times more than he does to sport a 'Dr.' before their names. what an irony. a businessman who makes money out of alcohol and tobacco and airlines thats not for the commoners and spends a fortune on his love of motor sport is touted as a patriot and gets a seat in the rajya sabha. if i even as much as express my wish to pursue my higher education abroad, questions like, "why abroad and why not India?" and "why private sector and why not govt job?" are immediately raised.
are you kidding me? is there an Indian team in formula one? which one? that team called 'force India'? i wonder why that mallya guy calls it that. for publicity sake i guess, maybe he thinks that would make people back home feel that 'mallya is indeed patriotic', probably he thinks he can fool Indians into thinking that force India is indeed an Indian team making a mark in the world of motor sport..... wish i could read his mind, but since i cant, heres my speculation on how his brain works....
now, most of the teams in formula one in my opinion are either owned by brands that get a lot of publicity out of owning a formula one team, namely red bull and the likes or they are car manufacturers that are vying for the top spot for a rise in their sales. if i were given an option between a Ferrari and a Jaguar (price and specifications being the same) i would obviously pick a Ferrari. because jaguar doesn't have a formula one team and the one that Ferrari has is really good. I'd hope that some of their formula one expertise would trickle down to its road cars as well.
i do not buy kingfisher airlines tickets and nor does anyone else because its owner also has a formula one team. i don't think he (vijay mallya) believes that motor sport enthusiasts have suddenly developed a taste for kingfisher soda (and other assorted beverages) after his success in formula one. so, in my opinion, all vijay mallya is doing, is living his motor sport fantasies, and how!!! indeed, money hai, toh honey hai...!!!
i wish he spent some moolah on education here in India. unfortunately people here have to work many times more than he does to sport a 'Dr.' before their names. what an irony. a businessman who makes money out of alcohol and tobacco and airlines thats not for the commoners and spends a fortune on his love of motor sport is touted as a patriot and gets a seat in the rajya sabha. if i even as much as express my wish to pursue my higher education abroad, questions like, "why abroad and why not India?" and "why private sector and why not govt job?" are immediately raised.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
fresh food
he: "who are you calling?"
me: "no one in particular. just giving a missed call home so that mom knows i will be home in 5 minutes"
he: "and?"
me: "and mom will start making rotis for me so that i dont have to wait and a can finish it off and head back on time"
its nice to have your college so close to your home i thought for the gazillionth time since i joined the god forbidden college of mine.
on my way home i meet some usual people, people who seem to be there just to see me walk past them during the lunch break, some of those dont seem to be around any other time i pass that way. a perfume vendor who lays ground right at the gate of noor masjid, a little further a few taxi wallas at the edge of the road, near the turn, about halfway down the road, a great black dog (forgive me for the lack of knowledge of their breeds) has taken a liking to barking at a hungry stomach (on my way back he behaves like a perfect gentledog).
so i reach home and tune in to nat geo. "so much for national pride" i heard Paul Merton say while getting out for the 24th time in front of the wickets and 1st time without being blindfolded in a game of cricket......of the blind.
Paul Mertons is the only show on nat geo and similar channels about the life in India that i have ever liked. its, in my books, somewhere between 'dogfights' and 'international terrorism since...' on the 'i like it' scale.
In this particular show, Paul Merton is taken for a visit to some place in Rajasthan by an RJ. the peregrination starts from the radio station (where Paul Merton gets a lesson on Hinglish) to a seemingly small place similar in 'the feel' of a hospital. -I HATE HOSPITALS- . its a place where the disabled, particularly those who lost their limb/s or never had them from birth get an artificial one fitted. they say that its among the first places that started work on prosthetic limbs and the cheapest place to get yourself a prosthetic limb. yes. cheapest on earth. its free of cost. and from taking measurements to fabricating the prosthetic limb to fitting the artificial limb, just takes about an hour or so.
so this little boy (probably 9-10 years old by the looks) had a leg less (donno if it was right or left) from birth. got his measurements done and in no time his long lost friend, this one in plastic, was presented to him. he didnt waste a second in strapping it to whatever part of the leg he had in flesh and off he went. i had read in my English text book in school about Sudha Chandran who lost her leg in an accident and later had great difficulty in performing with the prosthetic, mostly because of the pain. and some pain it was. and yet, i saw, the boy did not walk. his firs steps on two feet were a sprint. Usain Bolt wouldnt have felt as happy on his victory, i thought, as that little boy must be feeling now. and yet the boy seemed to carry an expression that said "uh, this? so what? big deal..!!".
but surely he must have been very happy. yeah surely. even i was. and did i feel tears in my eyes? no cant be. i was irritated by the lectures. i was frustrated. "oh, what medicines make me do!". thought i better finish my lunch before i get too late.
me: "no one in particular. just giving a missed call home so that mom knows i will be home in 5 minutes"
he: "and?"
me: "and mom will start making rotis for me so that i dont have to wait and a can finish it off and head back on time"
its nice to have your college so close to your home i thought for the gazillionth time since i joined the god forbidden college of mine.
on my way home i meet some usual people, people who seem to be there just to see me walk past them during the lunch break, some of those dont seem to be around any other time i pass that way. a perfume vendor who lays ground right at the gate of noor masjid, a little further a few taxi wallas at the edge of the road, near the turn, about halfway down the road, a great black dog (forgive me for the lack of knowledge of their breeds) has taken a liking to barking at a hungry stomach (on my way back he behaves like a perfect gentledog).
so i reach home and tune in to nat geo. "so much for national pride" i heard Paul Merton say while getting out for the 24th time in front of the wickets and 1st time without being blindfolded in a game of cricket......of the blind.
Paul Mertons is the only show on nat geo and similar channels about the life in India that i have ever liked. its, in my books, somewhere between 'dogfights' and 'international terrorism since...' on the 'i like it' scale.
In this particular show, Paul Merton is taken for a visit to some place in Rajasthan by an RJ. the peregrination starts from the radio station (where Paul Merton gets a lesson on Hinglish) to a seemingly small place similar in 'the feel' of a hospital. -I HATE HOSPITALS- . its a place where the disabled, particularly those who lost their limb/s or never had them from birth get an artificial one fitted. they say that its among the first places that started work on prosthetic limbs and the cheapest place to get yourself a prosthetic limb. yes. cheapest on earth. its free of cost. and from taking measurements to fabricating the prosthetic limb to fitting the artificial limb, just takes about an hour or so.
so this little boy (probably 9-10 years old by the looks) had a leg less (donno if it was right or left) from birth. got his measurements done and in no time his long lost friend, this one in plastic, was presented to him. he didnt waste a second in strapping it to whatever part of the leg he had in flesh and off he went. i had read in my English text book in school about Sudha Chandran who lost her leg in an accident and later had great difficulty in performing with the prosthetic, mostly because of the pain. and some pain it was. and yet, i saw, the boy did not walk. his firs steps on two feet were a sprint. Usain Bolt wouldnt have felt as happy on his victory, i thought, as that little boy must be feeling now. and yet the boy seemed to carry an expression that said "uh, this? so what? big deal..!!".
but surely he must have been very happy. yeah surely. even i was. and did i feel tears in my eyes? no cant be. i was irritated by the lectures. i was frustrated. "oh, what medicines make me do!". thought i better finish my lunch before i get too late.
sodium chloride
"The NaCl conditions are given to you in the froblem. Now if the saap rotates by......" he went and i wondered if it will ever end. this was obviously not the beginning of the lecture; it was more towards the end. i wished the design data books of all my mechanical engineer brothers and sis....erm.....brothers could just disappear and take him along. i felt helpless, and irritated even more. yes. irritated. frustrated. i knew i was frustrated. and i have a suspicion that its got something to do with my medicines. medicines....yeah....medicines. shit. i hate hospitals. i hate doctors(not the pretty ones who are still studying but those who look at me in the face and immediately conclude that i need a blood test). blood tests, i hate them.
bloody blood tests! whats the need to take so much blood? two bloody test tubes! you starting a charitable trust for vampires or what? i had a swab test done too. just 3 quick swabs of my saliva from the throat.......they did not ask me to spit 2 test tubes full! why, i wouldn't mind doing that if they had asked me.....you dont almost faint after spitting 2 test tubes full, or so i believe. "NaCl....ly the saap is at rest. bhen its starts moving,......", he went on.
bloody blood tests! whats the need to take so much blood? two bloody test tubes! you starting a charitable trust for vampires or what? i had a swab test done too. just 3 quick swabs of my saliva from the throat.......they did not ask me to spit 2 test tubes full! why, i wouldn't mind doing that if they had asked me.....you dont almost faint after spitting 2 test tubes full, or so i believe. "NaCl....ly the saap is at rest. bhen its starts moving,......", he went on.
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